Fighting “Fine” : What’s Holding You Back From Your Best Life

Life + Faith

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If you’ve been hanging around for a while, you may know that my word for this year has been “authenticity.” I’ve been trying to keep it in front of me, trying to really figure out who I am, get to the crux of who I was made to be and then live it out in the world. 


Along the way, God has been speaking to me about why some things in my life aren’t as “successful” as they could be or, at least, why they are just “fine” Like, good, by all accounts, but “fine” just the same. Relationships, work, creativity – all of it. 


Are you finding yourself at a crossroads? Maybe you are searching for your authentic self or fulfilling relationships with yourself and others, be it romantic, familial or friendly. I have found the answer. 


It can be defined in one word. It all comes down to this…. Ready?



Or Surrender.

Whichever floats your boat the most. 


In my search for authenticity & fulfillment I’ve realized the biggest barrier is my resistance to submit every part of myself to God. Like all of it. 


What really got me thinking about it was hanging out with a friend I hadn’t seen in a long time. We talked about how she goes to church and does her payer journal & Bible study – which are all really, really good things. But I couldn’t help but notice as we hung out with others that certain behaviors didn’t match some of the values we talked about. And a light bulb came on. Just as I was about ready to feel some sort of judgy towards her for not living what she professed her values to be, I got chin-checked by the holy spirit: “Are you doing the same?”


Have you relegated God to your prayer journal & Sunday mornings or have you let Him into your life? Are you the same person on Sunday that you are with your friends? 


The big looming question is: Have you submitted your LIFE to God or have you just made up a bunch of other things to do that make you feel like a good Christian? 

Have you submitted where you go? Who you spend time with? How you speak & the language you use? What you consume? What you post? How you do your job? How you treat people at your job? Do you make decisions after praying (i.e. talking at God about them) without consulting His word? 


Have you opened up every area of your life to the Holy Spirit to speak into? If God told you to stop using those words or going to certain places, would you? Or is your comfort & your own plan more important than your submission to God’s plan (que Aubry)?


These are the questions I had to ask myself.


The Bible says “…purify your hearts, you double-minded.” (James 4:7) If what you think is best frequently outweighs the consideration of God’s best even though you love Him and want to follow Him – this is double mindedness. And honestly, it’s exhausting. At least it is for me. 


If you find yourself trusting you more than you trust Him: 1. You’re not alone, we all do this at some point or to some degree. 2. We are all wrong. His plan is better. All the time. 100% of the time. It’s never not better than yours. Ever. I’m trying to be as clear as I can ya’ll. 


“What if, in the midst of the temptations this world throws at us, we choose not to conform to the standards that everyone else seems to think are normal or, even worse, expected? What if we instead yield our will to what He calls us to do? We’re called to push all of our affection to a loving God who adores us – not to worship the material possessions that this world offers … Even the most outrageous and dazzling ideas we have for a good life aren’t even in the same universe as the plans He has for us.”
(What Does It Mean To Worship: YouVersion app)

“2 Stop imitating the ideals and opinions of the culture around you,[a] but be inwardly transformed by the Holy Spirit through a total reformation of how you think. This will empower you to discern God’s will as you live a beautiful life, satisfying and perfect in his eyes.” Romans 12:2 (TPT)


Listen, it’s totally fine to have desires & a vision for your life. It’s good! But if you find yourself not quite where you want to be and not seeing the fruit that you desire it may be time for a reality check in your spiritual life. Even if your life is fine. Good even – there’s more. And God wants you to have it: 

“For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly.” Psalm 84:11 ESV


The only way to fight the battle of  “fine” is to surrender. Is your life His or yours? Have you opened up your WHOLE life for God to speak into? If not, how can you change that today?  Let God make you – your best life resides with who He wants you to be.


    Tarin Souriya

    August 22, 2019Reply

    This was an amazing read and honestly a huge reality check for myself. I’m more like that friend you speak of but then I got around to the looming question and had to really question where I was at spiritually. Have I been submitting? Surrendering? Or holding on too tightly to my own plans/visions. I think it’s a constant battle of trying to figure out who you are.. to be that SAME exact person on Sunday & while out with friends. This definitely challenged my mind and made me rethink a lot of things!

    Thanks for the good read!


      August 22, 2019Reply

      Thank you for your thoughtfulness & honesty! Yes, it is a process learning to die to self in exchange for what’s greater. I think that’s what has helped me, to remember I am in process and as long as I decide every day to focus on God in a real, tangible way I’ll get to where I need to be!

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